Billy Ocean on John Wayne Bobbit

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Speaking of jewels of the Nile, Billy Ocean, 80s Caribbean pop star — and one of the only dark-skinned men guilty of doing the white man’s overbite — turns 55 today. Ocean, a vocal penis supporter, has stated that he will wear a red ribbon around his own snake-like member throughout his birthday to bring attention to the continued injustice perpetuated by the Bobbitt case.

INCOMING! JANUARY 17, 2005

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