Mr. Britney Spears No More
» Music
Some people are quite delighted with the news of the Spears / Federline divorce:
MAYBE there is hope for this great nation after all. No matter who won the House or the Senate, all is right with the world. For Britney Spears has finally filed for divorce from Kevin Federline.
PLEASE, BRITNEY BRING SEXY BACK
Oh, the heartless mockery:
K-Fed has, above all else, street cred. The street in question might be Rodeo Drive, but still. People make such a big deal out of the fact that 50 Cent has been shot nine times. Try being K-Fed for a day. Try loading a day’s worth of shopping and 11 slacker buddies into one Rolls-Royce Phantom and then come talk to me about street cred.
Wannabe rapper can now sell his CDs out of the trunk of his Ferrari
Sordid speculations:
Several gossip sites are reporting that Spears left Federline days ago after he snapped into a rage, screaming at Spears and destroying property. The reason for the outburst was apparently because Spears laughed at a tape of Federline’s WWE appearances.
The Federline/Spears Split & What It Has To Do With WWE
Kevin Federline as musician:
It’s a good thing Kevin Federline has been earning some money lately. He was hit earlier this year with a copyright infringement lawsuit filed by Thomas Dolby. For the younger set, you’ll remember Dolby from his smash hit, “She Blinded Me With Science,” which was recently named by VH1 as one of the top songs of the 80s. Apparently, K-Fed liked the song enough to sample it in his “America’s Most Wanted” tune which he streamed on his MySpace page. The song was reportedly downloaded over half a million times.
K-Fed Slapped with Sample Suit
Kevin Federline as man of letters:
Kevin Federline won’t be tackling his new project on his own, he will hire the services of a ghostwriter.
“I haven’t done it yet. You know, I’ll get a ghostwriter in there,” he added.
Kevin Federline tired of “Mr Britney Spears” tag
Kevin Federline as artist and performer:
Initial reviews of his new album range from the Associated Press’s declaration of “a credible, entertaining debut” to Slant Magazine’s complaint that “Federline can only rap about weed, his bank account, his wife, fighting anyone who looks at him sideways, and partying ‘til three days from now.”
Kevin Federline hosts live fan and celebrity showcase on MuchMusic
An informal survey of the crowd yielded a foursome who confessed that they were friends of K-Fed’s manager and had gotten free tickets; two judgment-reserving girls who also had free tickets, which they’d won from TRL; a priceless foreign couple who admitted they’d first heard of Kevin Federline “this day”; and one couple with mixed intentions. (She: “I’m not a fan, just really into the tabloids!” He, glumly: “My girlfriend made me come.”)
K-Fed Rocks Near-Empty Webster Hall
He then tried to appease the crowd saying, “Everyone get drunk! That’s what I’m going to do!”
Federline Promotes New Album Without Wife
An eyewitness said: “He seemed really confused about how to act on stage. He would pace from one side of the stage to the other, just saying things like, ‘Hey’ 30 times in a row or ‘New York, thank you for coming - buy my CD.’”
Kevin Federline as philosopher:
“I knew I was going somewhere,” he insists. “I didn’t know where it was.”
Kevin Federline Makes It On His Own During A Stop At MuchMusic
